2014-07: Calling the Estats Xhenerais to Order

[Trotxâ]

Good evening, fellow Citizens of the Great Province of Vuode, fellow subjects of His Majesty King John, and assembled cestours. As it is the seventh Full Moon of 2014 has risen, I am pleased as the duly-elected Presiding Officer of the Estats Xhenerais of the United Provinces of Vuode and Dandenburg, I declare that our next legislative session is hereby open.

<bangs gavel>

This body shall remain is session until the new moon rises on Saturday, 26 July 2014. This body shall recess at approximately 11:00PM, unless or until the Premier of Vuode shall ask the Estats Xhenerais to remain in session.

<bangs gavel>

The Chair recognizes that today, 11 July is National Blueberry Muffin Day. The Chair has commissioned the renowned bakers at Peter Sciortino's Bakery in Maracopa to prepare a several dozen of today's masterpiece to help us celebrate. Please help yourself while they last. We have coffee too.

To show our support for local music in Vuode, we have asked I'm Not a Pilot to open our session. I'm Not a Pilot is an indie rock/classical band of cestours from Milwaukee who were voted Best Rock Band 2010 and 2011 in Milwaukee’s Shepherd Express Weekly and Best Rock Band 2010 at WYMS 88.9fm Radio Milwaukee’s Independent Music Awards. Known as Milwaukee's "Guitar-less rock band", INaP features Mark Glatzel on keyboard, Steve Vorass Jr. on drum, Peter Thomas cello, and Adrian Esguerra on bass. Here they are performing "No Order" from their latest album Screaming Songs from I'm Not A Pilot.



Thank you, thank you guys. What a wonderful performance. We hope you will be able to join us for our closing. Let's give them a big round of applause! Huzzah!

<bangs gavel>

Now we turn to the business part of our meeting. Citizens of Vuode Province – this is your democratic government in action. We invite you share your thoughts and ideas here in this meeting.

We open with the required disclaimers:

All citizens and cestours of this, the finest province in the Kingdom of Talossa, are invited to stand now, and to present to us their Councillors any petitions, proposals, projects, programs or policies. Please come forward to the microphone, state your name and canton, the organization represented (if any), the title of the matter addressed and your position in favor or against; then proceed with remarks topic that brings you before the assembled Counselors. Generally, speakers will have at least one (1) minute to speak, but generally not more than five (5) minutes. Speakers should limit remarks to the designated time limit as determined by the Chair. Speakers are cautioned that only topics specifically related to the operations of the United Provinces of Vuode and Dandenburg and the function of the Estats Xhenerais are appropriate in this forum. Please be aware that all comments, documents, exhibits, evidence, petitions or writs presented shall become part of the public record.

Councillors and citizens are required to use proper language when addressing the Estats Xhenerais. Councillors, citizens and cestours shall not use profanity or cursing, aggressive or threatening behavior when addressing the Estats Xhenerais or other participants. All comments are directed to the Presiding Officer and not to individual Councillors or to the audience. No personal verbal attacks toward any individual will be allowed during the conduct of a Estats Xhenerais session. Any Councillor, including the Presiding Officer, may have individual(s) removed from the podium and/or Estats Xhenerais Chambers if such conduct persists after a warning has been issued.

No person, including but not limited to registered lobbyists, except Councilors and the staff of the Estats Xhenerais, shall be permitted access to the Members Bar and Lounge, except that employees of liquor distributors and employees of the Lake Park Golf Course may be granted admission for the purpose performing their employer-requested duties. Attendees of these meetings are heartily encouraged to tip the wait staff for services provided.

It is the intent of these rules that the deliberations and actions of the Estats Xhenerais be conducted and taken openly in order that the citizens and cestours may be fully informed, it being the finding of the Estats Xhenerais that the citizens must be fully informed if they are to be intelligently advised as to the conduct of public business by their duly elected Councilors.

This public meeting is now open for the good of the People and Province of Vuode.

God Save the King!

T

[Trotxâ]

Good evening, fellow Citizens of the Great Province of Vuode, fellow subjects of His Majesty King John, and assembled cestours. Thank you for joining us tonight for the closing of the final session of the Estats Xhenerais. As Presiding Officer, I ask for your attention and your patience as we wrap up. We have four items of business on tonight's agenda.

First, we would again like to ask you to put your hands together for our hosts here at the clubhouse of beautiful Lake Park Golf Course. They have been our most gracious hosts for all legislative session this term. Let's give them all a great big round of applause!

[Hearty Applause]

<bangs gavel>

Next, the chair would like once again to take a moment to thank our Premier of our beloved province for his service this term: the Honourable Éovart Grischun. Please join me in giving our Premier a round of applause.

[Hearty Applause]

<bangs gavel>

Third, we have public service announcement. As a Councillor in the Estats Xhenerais, you too could be having fun at the all-you-can-eat Lake Park Clubhouse buffet, as long as the next Presiding Officer chooses to meet here. Here's how you do it:

In accordance with Article III, SECTION 5 of the constitution of the United Provinces of Vuode and Dandenburg, any adult citizen of Vuode may claim a seat in the Estats Xhenerais. This is done by making a declaration in public as follows: "I, name, hereby claim my right to be seated in the next Grand Session of the Estats Xhenerais". The citizen shall then be officially seated after swearing or affirming oath to the Cunstaval.

We will open a Witt thread once the yet-to-be announced particulars of the next election are announced. Remember – this is democracy in action here in Vuode. All citizens of our province are invited to claim a seat.

Finally, it is my duty as Presiding Officer to conclude this session. This is new ground for us, and the law is unclear. The chair tenders the following proposal, with the hope that the issue will be considered in our next Grand Session:

Whereas, ARTICLE II: SECTION 2 of the Constitution of Vuode (CoV) says, "The Cunstaval shall be responsible for the swearing in of each member of the Estats Xhenerais and the dissolving of each Grand Session of the Estats Xhenerais."; and

Whereas, the Cunstaval has NOT dissolved this Grand Session of the Estats Xhenerais; and

Whereas, ARTICLE III, SECTION 3 of the CoV says, "Grand Sessions of the Estats Xhenerais are instantly convened and dissolved with those of the national Ziu."; and

Whereas, this article and section contradicts the previously mentioned article annd section; and

Whereas, ARTICLE IV, SECTION 3 of the CoV says, "Each Grand Session of the Estats Xhenerais shall be made of six legislative sessions and shall mirror the schedule of the national Ziu. This includes any months of recess."; and

Whereas, we’ve shared how this article doesn't work well with the current format; and

Whereas, ARTICLE IV, SECTION 3 contradicts the two previously mentioned Sections; and

Whereas, we don't have a precedent for the next step.

Therefore, the following proposal is placed before this body: This Grand Session of the Estats Xhenerais of the best province in Talossa, is, and of right ought to be, dissolved.

Anyone present who objects to this motion, please make your will known by saying "Nay."

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Hearing no objections, the motion carries.

<bangs gavel>

As the duly-elected Presiding Officer of the Estats Xhenerais of the United Provinces of Vuode and Dandenburg, I declare that this Grand Session is hereby closed. Thank you to the good people of the Province of Vuode, the best place to live in Talossa. We'll see you again after the election.

God Save the King!

<bangs gavel>